Wednesday, 22 July 2009

Titles get hard to think of after a while....

Today seems to be a day of unexplained grumpiness for me. Maybe it's not enough sleep (I fell asleep for an hour or so again this afternoon), or maybe it's not, I don't know. But I don't feel like writing, tidying, doing anything. Today is the first time while doing NaBloPoMo this month that I have to force myself to write. A little stroppy part of me, even as I type this is going, "You can't make me write! I won't do it!".

It's funny, coz I've been doing really well for this past few days. I'm trying to use the month between now, and me moving out and into a new place, to examine my life and fix what's not working. I want to start with a clean slate. This of course starts with my constantly mentioned tidying and sorting, but it's been other things as well. I'm beginning to be aware of blocks I have in my thinking, and the ways I interact with the people in my life. I'm trying to look at every situation from different angles and not do things, or act in certain ways just because it's what I've always done. This is new to me. I'm used to hanging onto ideas and fears and grudges for dear life. And it feels so, so good to let go.

Maybe that's why I'm grumpy today, too much of everything shifting around inside my head...

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